(in the style of the kids TV show "Make a Wish")
by Ronald Bruce Meyer
16 December 2001

If you were a tern, you just might be a bird,
Or a boat or a game, but that's not our word.
This Sunday, in fact, as you're bound to learn,
Lamprey members will seek to and strive to and earn
Many rich rewards here on the word of concern--
That's T-U-R-N -- which is how we spell turn --
With a U inside that turns back on itself
Like a U-turn in traffic 'round the median shelf.
It's a versatile verb when you put it to use,
If you have an imagination to loose!

In the musical world, "Turn Around, Look At Me"
Was a Glen Campbell hit that sold way more than three.
What turned up for Cyrkle was their "Turn Down Day"
And E.L.O. hit with "Turn to Stone" in their way.
Now Gloria Estefan, in "Turn the Beat Around,"
Said the music she loves has a great percussion sound.
And if Pete Seeger never adapted the words
Of the Bible, Judy Collins, and before her the Byrds
Would never have hit with the song "Turn! Turn! Turn!"
For a hit like that, most of us could but yearn.

But make a wish... it might come true.
It's all up to you... it's all up to you!

In the realm of ballet there's a turning point yet
When you whip 'round in time with a step called fouette.
To turn a 360 is the pirouette flair,
But to lift off the ground is called tour en l'air.
A turn-out in ballet is the pose en dehors,
But to be turned out, sadly, you're shoved out the door.
You could wish to turn back the clock in that case,
Or to do a good turn, so that wrong turn erase,
If you turn the other cheek, you might return some day,
For one good turn deserves another... they say.

There are many turns, you know, if you want to play games,
Like The Turn of the Screw -- scary novel by James.
But that kind of novel doesn't turn me on, truly.
It's a turn-off, I say: I find night ghosts unruly!
A nocturne is music for a nighttime serenade.
To be taciturn is to be silent and staid.
A Saturnine person is dull, gloomy, grave;
The opposite of mercurial -- no way to behave!
A turncoat's an apostate, a renegade defector.
A lecturn is where stands the holy writ lector.
A counterturn gives a play's plot a bad twist.
A turnaround is often an opportunity missed.
A turntable used to make records go round.
The herb root called turnip is dug from the ground.
A turnkey's in charge of locking the gate--
If you long for the turnpike, you'll just have to wait!

But make a wish... it might come true.
It's all up to you... it's all up to you!

To turn is to move or to show a fresh side,
To change your direction, to corner and slide,
To transfer, divert, to switch aspect or fashion,
To shape or to mold in a lathe turned with passion;
To hinge on or depend; to drive out or repel,
To transform or transmute, as with magic spell,
To bring up to the top as a plow turns the soil,
To persuade or convert one who, 'til now, was loyal,
To turn as the tide, or a stomach when sick,
To wind, bend, meander (that's no easy trick!)
To take your due chance: take your turn's what is meant.
To take a bad turn returns illness as sent.

A turnbuckle's a hasp or the end of a chain.
A turner is one who will exercise fain--
Or have you considered the Turner of rock,
Well turned legs -- "Private Dancer" -- born Anna Bullock?
There's a turnix, you know, that's an African bird,
And a pastry that's folded 'round fruit, so I've heard,
Is a turnover: race through the the turnstile to buy it!
Leave no stone unturned to find those who supply it.
You see? I induce so many phrases to turn.
Just tell me to turn it off, then we'll adjourn.

Yes, make that wish... it might come true.
It's all up to you... it's all up to you!

--Uptight, Late-Night, Stage Fright Ronald, The Duke of Doggerel

Ronald Bruce Meyer is a freelance doggerelist.
This word was chosen by Ronald the week before --
when he served his first "turn" as adjudicator!